Ernie K-Doe . . . was an adored elder statesman of New Orleans music, a larger-than-life character, and usually an amiable host. The Mother-in-Law Lounge, which thrived in K-Doeâs image until 2010, was a place that filled visitors with giddy wonderment. Their delight ensued from the loungeâs welcoming environment and the surreal sensory overload that walloped all who crossed the threshold. This physical entrance doubled as the conceptual portal into Ernie K-Doeâs eccentric parallel universeâa festive, Fellini-esque realm where shameless idolatry and unfettered happiness reigned supreme. (âThereâs a lot of love in hereâ was a frequent, typical reaction of first-time visitors.)
These intriguing enticements inspired many to bring their friends to the Mother-in-Law Lounge, for the pure fun of watching the newcomersâ enthrallment with this joyous, quirky little bar. The loungeâs hybrid ambience combined elements of a juke joint, a mosh pit, an R&B museum, and a cinematic set from Satyricon. It attracted a similarly eclectic clientele. Well-dressed, middle-aged black people bellied up to the bar alongside white street kids with torn jeans and bizarre piercings. Joining them were politicians seeking cultural credibility, off-duty cops, laborers in dirty work clothes, and fanatical R&B fans on pilgrimages to hallowed music sites around the South. A busload of blue-haired suburban ladies might turn up at any minute, stopping in for a nightcap after a casino gambling excursion. Birthday celebrants might likewise arrive en masse, sporting all manner of outrageous costumes. Derelicts and winos wandered in at times, receiving the same respect as well-heeled customers. The harmonious interactions of these diverse patrons affirmed them in the tradition of Huey P. Longâs credo âEvery Man a King.â Or, as Ernie K-Doe often put it, âAll you got to do is just keep the faith in what you are doing. You set your goal line, and donât let nobody change you. You know what you say when people tell you you canât do something? Fool, shut your mouth up!â
This resolute stance helped propel Ernie K-Doe through years of scuffling before âMother-in-Lawâ hit the top. It also helped sustain him through the long, lean years after his star had faded. He nurtured himself during these tough times with glorious memories of May 1961, when âMother-in-Lawâ became the best-selling record in America. The best-selling record in two Americas, actuallyâwhite and blackâas delineated by Billboard magazineâs separate sales charts for pop and R&B. âMother-in-Lawâ topped both charts, ruling popâs Hot 100 for a single week and dominating the R&B survey for five. In pop it unseated Del Shannonâs âRunawayâ and was in turn replaced by Ricky Nelsonâs âTravelinâ Man.â (No other New Orleans artist, not even Fats Domino, had ever reached this peak with a song recorded in New Orleans. Domino, in fact, despite his frequent lofty chart positions and astronomical sales, never had a number-one record.) On the R&B side, âMother-in-Lawâ displaced Ray Charlesâs âOne Mint Julepâ and was bumped by Ben E. Kingâs âStand by Me.â (Charles and K-Doe would compete again at the Grammy Awards, when Charlesâs âHit the Road Jackâ was voted best R&B recording of1961, leaving âMother-in-Lawâ as an also-ran.)
Compared to these hits and most others of the day, in both pop and R&B, âMother-in-Lawâ has very blunt lyrics. . . . [Though tame] by contemporary standards, they raised eyebrows in the early â60s, especially overseas. The English music weekly Melody Maker opined that âMother-in-Lawâ âhas made a big showing in the Statesâmore, we feel, on account of its simple melodic appeal and rocking beat than the libellous sentiments it contains.â But Londonâs New Musical Express praised the song as âa cute comedy number in which Ernie tells his mother-in-law a few home truths about herself.â
If K-Doeâs disdainful sentiments in âMother-in-Lawâ flirt with libel, his terse and deceptively cool delivery belie its caustic message. In New Orleans speak, this state of obvious annoyanceâwhich, as alert observers realize, could imminently escalate into fireworksâis often telegraphed with the warning âYou are working my last single nerve!â K-Doeâs ominously understated, last-single-nerve delivery is complemented by the sparse, less-is-more arrangement of producer Allen Toussaint. Toussaint, a New Orleans rhythm and blues savant who emerged as a major creative figure in American popular music, also plays piano on âMother-in-Law.â His lilting solo echoes the Afro-Caribbean-influenced styles of such seminal New Orleans pianists as Jelly Roll Morton (Ferdinand LaMothe) and Professor Longhair (Henry Roeland Byrd). A century before âMother-in-Law,â the same folk traditions had inspired the classical compositions of native son Louis Moreau Gottschalk.
âMother-in-Lawâ was so popular that it inspired two âanswer songsâ: âSon-in-Law,â by the girl group the Blossoms, also recorded by Louise Brown (âthe other day he even hocked her wedding ringâ), and âBrother-in-Law (Heâs a Moocher),â by rockabilly artist Paul Peek (âHeâs lazy, wonât work, never had a jobâget out of my house, you big fat slobâ). âMother-in-Lawâ is still considered a classic of overlapping genres, including R&B, pop, rock, and the loosely defined âbeach musicâ of the Carolina coast. It has been reissued on at least a hundred anthologies and continues to get significant airplay on such diverse programs as Theme Time Radio Hour with Your Host Bob Dylan and American Routes with Nick Spitzer, and numerous oldies shows on R&B and pop stations. A multitude of new renditions continue to be recorded, including several Spanish-language versions, commonly titled âLa Suegra.â In New Orleans, where the borders between musical genres are extremely porous, bands of every sort are asked to play âMother-in-Law.â Theyâre expected to know it, along with K-Doeâs regional hits âTâaint It the Truth,â âHello My Lover,â âTe Ta Te Ta Ta,â and âA Certain Girl.â None of these other fine songs achieved national success comparable to that of âMother-in-Law,â but all are perpetual Gulf Coast favorites. Collectively they established the reputations of Ernie K-Doe and Allen Toussaint as masters of New Orleans rhythm and blues.
This was no small achievement at a time when that field was quite crowded. A vast surge of creativity and commercial success energized the Crescent City from the late 1940s to the early â60s, an era later dubbed the golden age of New Orleans rhythm and blues. A cursory list of its other luminaries includes Fats Domino, Professor Longhair, Shirley and Lee, Smiley Lewis, Irma Thomas, Lee Dorsey, Lloyd Price, Art Neville, Aaron Neville, Huey âPianoâ Smith, Frankie Ford, and Clarence âFrogmanâ Henry. The Meters and Dr. John, who emerged in the late â60s, and the Neville Brothers (with siblings Aaron, Art, Charles, and Cyril), who formed a decade later, also stand in that illustrious number. So do the musicians who accompanied these artists on many of their records: saxophonists Lee Allen and Nat Perrilliat, drummers Earl Palmer and Smokey Johnson, bassists Frank Fields and Lloyd Lambert, and guitarists Roy Montrell, Justin Adams, and âDeaconâ John Moore, to name but a few.
Ernie K-Doe felt thrilled when âMother-in-Lawâ reached the top. He felt gratified decades later by its staying power. But he never ever felt surprised. âThere ainât but two songs that will stand the test of time,â K-Doe often declared. He would then pause at considerable dramatic length before naming them: âThe first song is âThe Star Spangled Banner,â and the second song is âMother-in-Law.â Because people gonna have a mother-in-law until the end of the world.â
If K-Doe exaggerated his songâs importance, he did not overstate its broad, perpetual appeal. Negative depictions of mothers-in-law date back at least to the Roman satirist Juvenal: âGive up all hope of peace so long as your mother-in-law is alive.â Countless comedians, Henny Youngman for one, have echoed Juvenalâs sentiments: âI bought my mother-in-law a chair. Now they wonât let me plug it in.â And men are not alone in alleging persecution. The website www.motherinlawhell.com was created for âthe daughter-in-law sisterhood . . . you are not alone. stop suffering in silence.â . . .
When the song hit number one, Ernie K-Doe became a respected peer of his R&B idols. He began performing at prestigious venues around America and in the Caribbean. He cast a significant shadow of musical influence over Europe, especially the nascent world of the British Invasion; in the UK his songs were covered by the likes of the Yardbirds and Hermanâs Hermits. And he created a substantial and lasting legacy of top-notch rhythm and blues recordings. . . .
Ernie K-Doe recorded âMother-in-Lawâ on April 25, 1960. But the song that would become his signature tune sat on the shelf for nearly a year before its release, and it almost wasnât recorded at all. Accounts of the genesis of this epic number diverge on several key points. For the most part, K-Doe claimed to have written âMother-in-Lawâ himself, referring to his grim experience with his own mother-in-law Lucy (or Lucifer, as he called her) as ample proof of authorship. Sometimes he simply cited Allen Toussaint as the writer, acknowledging, âThere wouldnât be no Ernie K-Doe if there wasnât no Allen Toussaint.â In a third, more complex version, K-Doe claimed to have originated the concept and then coached Toussaint on how to get it down on paper . . .
Toussaintâs recollection includes no such collaboration, nor any real-life experience, on either K-Doeâs part or his own. âIt was odd,â he told journalist Steve Wildsmith, âbecause I wasnât married at the time, so I had no mother-in-law. It was just a joke used on television a lot in those daysââTake my mother-in-law . . . please!â [The song] was such a huge success, but it came from such an odd place.â . . .
Everyone involved with recording âMother-in-Lawâ agreed that Toussaint hastily scrapped the song when K-Doe didnât take to it immediately. Beyond this point of agreement, the narrative road quickly forks again. Toussaint has repeatedly stated that singer Willie Harper retrieved the song from the trash and persuaded Toussaint to try it again. K-Doe, of course, credited himself; who else would have had the prescience to rescue the creased and crumpled lead sheet from the wastebasket? âDonât you never think,â K-Doe raved, âthat I donât know what Iâm doing. I could make âem or I could break âem, I could throw âem in the trash can and dig âem out again like I did âMother-in-Lawâ! Oh, that was a blessed day, that day I dug âMother-in-Lawâ out the trash can! It made Ernie K-Doe all over the world, and thatâs why Iâm Ernie K-Doe today!â Toussaint, with typical tact and forbearance, offered a differing account: âThe story that âMother-in-Lawâ had gone in the trash is not fiction. But who pulled it out is fiction.â . . .